Relapses

I haven't posted much, at all, this month.
I'm doing...okay...
I always come back to thinking about when people get to know me really well, and how I think that ends up hurting me. But then again, I'm a very easily hurt person. I guess that I just feel vulnerable when people know me well...but even when they do I feel like they barely know me at all. It's weird and somewhat pointless to explain. I also worry easily, about such things and where things are heading and if things are okay. Things are never fully okay, that's just realistic.


I'm sick right now. I relapsed into sickness. Coughing, two sneezes today, feeling faint and dizzy, headache. It happens.

lovelovelove.

Update Of Some Kind

Posts have been slowing...
Today Hayden and I wanted adventure. First we stood in the rain on the top of the fire escape, observing. That was good. But good enough? NO! So we went and got my car stuck in the mud. Because it was raining, and dirt parking lots become muddy in the rain. Cameron and John (in moccasins) came, still was stuck, so John was nice enough to help me by calling to get it towed. And towed it was.
To make a long story short: I went to a Matt Costa show at BooBoo's, and it was a grand time.
Upon arrival to mi casa, I cleaned my room (landlords come to check out ze house tomorrow).
I've had some really good days this month... (with some lame days of school mixed in).
I don't really have anything deep to say, but thought I would give an update of some kind. :)

lovelovelove

thirty dialogues bleed into one (so this is the new year)

I'm not sure exactly why I'm blogging...just thought i should. it's a new year now. (i guess)

I was observing how fake some people can be, and it just occured to me, "i wonder if i seem fake". i dont think i do but then again sometimes i get real quiet and maybe i seem fake then.

michigan is nice. at a thrift store today i bought a bunch of hats. and some sweaters that say michigan. our neighbor (here) said she always tried buying michigan sweatshirts for her kids, but they never wanted them. i told her if i lived here i probably wouldn't. just how in california i dont buy california apparel.