I want to think what I should know.

I feel unsure about a great deal of things. Typical emotional sentence that can be supported well and therefore is justified. To be brief, it is interesting to reflect on who I am friends with and who I am close with. I consider a handful of people to be my best friends but I wish I could tell you that there is one of them who knows me so much better than the rest. Interesting how my best friends aren't even the ones I hang out with these days. These days I hang out with a handful of people I am very close to, and those are the ones who know me better than the rest. Maybe it frightens me how my relationships with people fluctuate or how I don't know the concept of consistency. 

When I am upset I go into a minimal mode. That is, one in which I try and seem as minimilistic and simple as possible. I do not know if there is a desired effect to it, I think it is just how I start to act by default when I don't know how to act. Acting like nothing sometimes seems safer than acting like something. Similarly, I try and keep my things-i-wish-i-hadn't-said-thoughts to myself because repeating them out loud, if even to regret them, just never seems like the best of ideas. Besides, I don't regret....I just replay over and over and think about why it is okay that things are how they are. I believe a lot of people try and live this way: sans regrets. 

I think it can be healthy to regret things here and there....but the overwhelming majority points to "don't". I am in this majority.

Time to sleep. Time to work. 

Goodnight!

love.love.love.